Which words should NEVER be in a speech or presentation? Part 2

speech or presentation

Which words should NEVER be in a speech or presentation? Part2

Following on from yesterday’s blog, I have a second edition – authored entirely by friends and followers!

A round of applause to Scott Westron for a long list – his contributions are wide ranging, typically caustic, pithy  – and some are very funny.:) Embarassingly I am guilty of one of them!!! Scott will not be impressed!

Scott Westron

  1. “a catalogue of errors” – ban. It’s what, exactly? Why not say ‘many’, ‘numerous’, ‘several’, ‘lots of’ errors?
  2. “Risk-averse” – It’s cautious / prudent. As opposed to being caution-averse?
  3. “Core Values” – Makes me cringe.
  4. “Key Performance Indicator” – ghastly phrase so frequently misused especially when abbreviated to KPI. Same as SLA, also grim.
  5. “In a league of our own” – Well, clearly not. That wouldn’t be a league – you can’t have a league of one.
  6. Best / Worse “Case Scenario. Presumably they normally mean Best / Worst ‘outcome’ or ‘result”.
  7. “One-to-one” Meeting. You mean a meeting between two people or in plainer speaking, just “a meeting”.
  8. “Can I help you?” I don’t know, can you? “Can I ask you a question?” You just have. Why ask to ask?
  9. “Any spare change, guv?” What’s spare change? There’s no such thing: it’s never ‘spare’. Do you have money you wish to donate?
  10. “All one word” or “all in lower-case” when describing how a website / email address is written. Neither is case sensitive … + it’s not one word, they’re more than one but have no spaces between them. ‘peterbotting’ – obviously two words, no space.
  11. “SO” when used like an American with ridiculous emphasis. I am SO not impressed. So why don’t they just say I’m not impressed?
  12. Referring to products as ‘bronze, silver, gold and platinum’ – always looks so dated and tacky.
  13. “Bespoke” e.g. Bespoke Solutions. Especially when not actually bespoke. They should mean customised / made to spec.
  14. “Timeless” [e.g. Timeless Design”] When they mean that in their view the design unlikely to look dated in the near future.
  15. “Gesture of Goodwill” – it’s a nauseating phrase which makes one feel like a charity. Please accept £5 GOGW – really?
  16. People who add ‘URGENT’ or ‘Response Required’ or ‘Please Reply ASAP’ atop of emails. I’ll reply when I can.
  17. “I am sorry you feel” [e.g.that our service has been poor]. Don’t be sorry for how I feel, be sorry that your service is poor!
  18. “Unfortunately…” at the start of a response. Terrible habit. It’s not unfortunate, it’s nothing to do with luck / fortune.
  19. “Obviously, especially when used in a customer service environment. “Obviously Mr W,” when it’s anything but bloody obvious.
  20. Rhetorically asking “well, you know?” at the start / end of a sentence – often it’s clear that the other person doesn’t.
  21. Adding ‘mate’ at the end of a sentence.
  22. People who say ‘No offense but…’ and then proceed to be deliberately and unambiguously offensive.
  23. “Polite Notice” (a) Why does a notice need a heading at all? (b) If it must have a heading, make it relevant to the message. c) Saying it’s a polite notice doesn’t mean it actually is polite.
  24. All sporting sayings used in business. ‘Close of Play’, ‘Back of the net’, ‘Touch-down’, ‘Hole in one”. All unforgivable.
  25. In work emails, “Please action” – they mean, please ‘do’ or ‘please …’. ‘Please action me a pint of beer.’ Of course not.
  26. Incomprehensible used when they mean ‘complex’. It can be comprehended, it’s just hard to.
  27. ‘Unimaginable’ when what they really mean is ‘not pleasant to imagine’. E.g. torture / pain – unimaginable suffering. I can!
  28. ‘Incomparable’. Rarely is anything said to be incomparable, actually incomparable: more often very easy to compare.
  29. Same goes for ‘unspeakable’, used often on news when – speaking – about something. Clearly not unspeakable.
  30. This or that was ‘impossibly’ hard to do. No, it may be ‘very’ hard to do, but since it’s been done, it’s clearly possible!

William Wong

  • YOU KNOW, KIND OF … LIKE

Tim Crossland

  • Use of the word ‘ask’ as a noun.

Chris Emmett

  • Really passionate?
  • Honestly believe?
  • To be honest?
  • OK guys let’s turn our brains inside out and look at this another way…….

Alexandra Ranson

  • “Hard working families”

Duncan Flynn

  • “blue sky thinking”

Melissa Conway

  • “Moving forward” is a pet hate of mine.
  • Also trying to make basic concepts sound original by the use of superfluous language/verbiage etc. Plain English gets you much more respect and attention, every time.

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